Thoughts of an unknown surviver
by Maxwell Cross
Summary: At first it was going to be a journal from a surviver of the Raccoon city incident but it didn't really come out that way. So now it's more the thoughts of a man who's been through what any would call hell on Earth.


-Foreword

Ok, I honestly don't know why I wrote this. I'm not saying it's bad I just don't know why I wrote it, about three or four years ago I sat down and felt the urge to write something based off of Resident Evil, so I did. It's not finished and probably never will be, I guess you could see it as sort of a choose your own adventrue and imagine how things go from there. ( To make sure it's clear, this isn't a choose your own adventure. I will NOT be accepting request as to how to finish this story. One entry is all there is) And of course as part of the whole disclamer bit, I don't own any of the characters belonging to Capcom, the Resident Evil series and so on and so forth. Enjoy and tell me what you think.

I don't remember when it all went downhill, one moment things were fine and then the next all hell broke loose. But I suppose this is what happens when you trust Umbrella. See I'm a member Raccoon police department, namely the S.W.A.T. team. I'm only 18 but I'm good at my job, at least I thought I was until the zombies came. I remember that all too well…..

We'd just been deployed on 8th street to try and push back the monsters, it had already been a day since people started dropping dead, and then coming back again. A large portion of the city was blocked off in hopes of containing the monsters, but they got through the blockade as if it weren't there. This was the third time the swat team was deployed to fight them, the first time was only two hours after the outbreak and half of our men were killed. The second time was worse, we lost only three men, but we had been sent to try and get as many civilians out as we could, I pushed as many of them as I could into the swat van and ordered the driver to go.

I remember climbing into the second van, firing my MP5 into the horde of undead while I pulled a scared teenage girl into the van with my free hand. I'd long since pulled off my helmet and head cover, and the girl looked at me. I could see her staring at me from the corner of my eye, I could tell she was amazed to see a man her own age fighting back. I think she might have been as terrified of me as she was of them from the snarl that was on my face. This time around we were lucky, a group of mercenaries from Umbrella had stumbled onto the battle and ordered us to go while they protected the few civilians that were left. As the van pulled away, I saw the merc's begin to pull back as they realized that they couldn't hold the monsters back, I was spared the sight of the mercenaries turning their guns on the civilians to give mercy killings as the van turned a corner.

But the third time was the worst, the few remaining police and swat members were gathered. Though we couldn't see them, we could hear them coming…I'll never forget that sound, it saved my life, being able to hear them before they came. I remember my hands sweating so bad that my gloves felt soggy. I heard my fellow team members muttering prayers and checking their ammo, checking to be sure to save up one last round for themselves. I shuddered at the thought, would I do the same? I didn't have time to think it over.

"Here they come!" said the squad leader who was only a Lieutenant

I raised my sub-machine gun a little higher and breathed deeply to try and calm myself. It didn't work. I saw them then, an army of the undead. And before I knew what I was doing, I was muttering a prayer and crossing myself. At that moment I stopped and laughed a little, never in my life had I believed in God, and here I was preparing myself to go see the Almighty in person. My teammates shared my laughter nervously, I was one of the better marksmen and they seemed worried that I was coming loose at the seams right before battle. "It's alright…I just though of something funny." I assured them.

Lt. Masterson raised his hand to signal us to readiness, we all fell silent as the zombies came ever closer and then it happened.

"FIRE!"

I pulled the trigger and released a stream of bullets into one of them and grinned as it went down. I tried to control my fire, but it was hard, I couldn't keep it down to short controlled bursts as I normally did. Before I knew it, I'd wasted three clips and was halfway through my fourth. My teammates were beginning to panic, like me they had unloaded several clips into the lines of the undead, but when they fell they rose again and marched relentlessly forward. I was starting to back up, a few others were too since the zombies kept coming closer to the line of cars, for every five zombies to go down, four got up again. Then the broke through the line, Lt. Masterson was the first to die, and that made me the senior officer, I was in charge.

"Don't hold back! Fire! FIRE!" I shouted, but it was no good. Half of them were dead, several of them had lost their fight to panic and were huddled on the ground crying like infants, until a zombie found them. The last few of us were almost jogging backward to keep ahead of the zombies, my hands had grown shaky, they'd started doing that after the first fight with the monsters. But when I pulled my last clip, I fumbled it. I tried to load it again and I couldn't. It just fell from my hands, and that's when I knew that I was about to lose it. I panicked, my hands shook so hard I thought they'd fall off, I'd already dropped my sub-machine gun and I wasn't about to try an pull my handgun or knife.

I kept staring at my hands whispering. "Oh God…" Over and over, then I snapped. I turned and ran, shouting over my shoulder. "Every man for himself!" It was so cowardly but I was scared, more scared than I remember. I heard my teammates shouting for me to come back and help them as the zombies took them down, but I never looked back as I ran. I can still hear them screaming……

That was only yesterday, I'm in my apartment now. Trying to figure out what to do, after I fled from the fight, I went to the station to pick up more ammo and a guns, I thought only of myself as I took the few remaining guns and ammo that wasn't locked up. After that I ran for the edge of the city, but I was too late. The Army had set up a barricade around the entire city, and no one was getting out zombie or not. I saw a man, a businessman I think, climb the barricade and try to leave. Of course he tried to tell the Army men that he'd give them money if they helped him. I remember the sight of his body spinning around and around as no less the thirty men fired on him.

So I went back to my apartment, and there I sat crying because I was a coward, because I wasn't getting out of the city alive, because there was no more hope.

I could hear them ...zombies, shambling up and down the streets as they tried to catch up to their prey. Usually some poor soul who was frightened out of his mind and running blindly. It wasn't until I watched them running that I saw that the zombies were horribly slow, the reason they were able to catch anyone was because said person gave into fear and ran blindly into a group of zombies. I sighed softly, it was so simple really. If I had kept my calm I would have seen that shooting the zombies in the head was the best way to go. I could have saved my friends with my hand gun if I had just stayed calm...

I didn't diserve to live, not after the way I ran and abandoned my comrades. But, I wasn't about to put a bullet in my brain or let myself starve. No...there was only one thing for it, I'd have to go out there and fight. The only way I could attone for my crime was to go back out there and keep fighting until I killed every last monster. Or until I fell.

Only two hours had passed since I made my decision, the last TV station in town had kept broadcasting up until the transmission cut out. From the looks on the anchorman's face, nothing serious had happened. Very likely some zombie had cut the power on accident, things like that had happened all over the city since the outbreak. I checked myself in the bathroom mirror on more time, my uniform was dirty and covered in old blood stains but in one piece. My short hair black hair was unkempt and my green eyes were red and slightly puffy from the crying I had done not to long ago. By sheer luck, my cell phone got a signal out of the city and I was able to call my family. My mother and father had gotten divorced years ago by mutual agreement. Rather than tear the family apart by fighting they separated by choice and because of that I was able to live on my own here in Raccoon City and become a S.W.A.T. team member. It was luck that I got in, oh sure, I had the skills but I was still young. In fact it was a member of S.T.A.R.S. that saw my talent and backed my entrance into the force. What was his name again? Redfield? Ridefield? Oh, it doesn't matter now, he could be dead for all I knew.

I left a message with my mother for everyone, telling them what had happened in the city and that I was caught up in it. It was hard telling her that I wasn't going to come out alive and even harder to ignore her pleas to not give up as I cut off the call and tucked the phone away in my jacket. I checked my weapons on more time. M9? Check. 12-gauge shotgun? Check. Knife? Check. Ammo? Check.


End file.
